Thursday, January 17, 2013

My Journey Home, Part 1 - Goals

Okay so I'm failing miserably.  The plan was to post twice a week not twice a month. ehh.... This month has been extremely busy! I have been coming up with posts in my head but I never find the time to sit down and write them.  I am sorry, I am trying to do better!

The Long Road Home
Image Source
I want to tell you why January has been so busy.... I am leaving my full time job to stay at home. It's taken a lot more preparation than I thought, and has involved me pretty much working two jobs this month.  Here's the story:

I have been wanting to quit to stay at home forever, and it was the plan all along, but we just never felt it was quite the right time to do it.  Early last year we came up with a plan of me quitting in the fall of 2013, and were pretty set to that idea.  We did the math to figure out if we could afford it, what our budget would be, etc and knew it would be possible.  We were comfortable with the 18 months of buffer time to figure out some sort of part-time work for me or my husband, and were working to save up a good emergency fund.

Then, one day in October, my husband randomly called me up in the middle of the day and said "You know what, I don't think we should wait another year for you to quit.  You need to be at home." Let me tell you, those are probably the sweetest words any working mother can hear!  We decided it would be best to wait for the year and the holiday season to be over (okay, so that was a bit selfish - the extra holiday pay and one last quarterly bonus that would happen between then and now was quite the incentive.)  So much has happened since then, and I plan to tell you all about it (but in installments, because it's quite a long story, and isn't over yet).

So the first thing I've been trying to figure out is how I am going to adjust schedule-wise.  I am used to coming home from work at 2 a.m. I stay up that late on weekends (five hours after husband and child are asleep) so that I am not too tired on the days I work.  I try to wake up at 8, but it's realistically more like 10. Because I'm not home, I rarely cook dinner.  I usually am too tired to clean during the week, so I just let the house accumulate a week's worth of mess and clean it all on Saturday. This isn't what I want life to be like, it is what one of my best friends/mentors calls "survival mode" - it's what you have to do in order to achieve something better.

My big goals are:
- to sleep from 10 p.m. to 6 a.m. This is a major adjustment! I have never been a morning person. I love staying up alone at night, watching TV shows the husband doesn't like, working on projects with no interruptions... it will be hard to give up that time.  How am I supposed to wake up at the crack of dawn and enjoy it? I have never experienced not being miserable in the morning.
- to make dinner. Real dinner with real food, not microwave stuff. I usually cook dinner like 2 days a week... I don't know if I can think of new meals every night!  This means I need to learn how to make a meal plan and stick to it.
-to actually spend time with the kiddo. Usually, when I'm with him, I'm struggling to stay awake and frantically get what little I can done.  This means he gets lots of TV time, lots of fast unhealthy foods, and very little play time with mommy.  I feel terrible about it, and it's time to change this!
-to keep the house clean consistently, rather than do it all in one day.  I have read some homemaking books to see what has worked for other people, and I am trying to get my own schedule in place.  This will definitely take some trial and error.  Right now I have a list of things to do every day (dishes, laundry, etc) and then I've divided the house into 14 sections so I can focus on one section each day - that way each room gets a good clean every two weeks. We will see how that works.

As you can tell, this is a lot.  This is a completely different lifestyle that what I have been living for... well, for my entire life.  It's what I want, but I am afraid of the difficulty that it will take to adjust.  I am afraid that I'm just going to give up and go back to my old ways.  I pray every night that I can do this.


  1. Oh man I wish I was a morning person too. I love staying up late too! Usually Jeremy and I stay up until 12:30 (Analiese goes to bed between 7 & 8 usually) and then I have to wake up at 7. And then I am tired so then I take a nap and then I don't get ready until like 2, seriously its a good day if I get ready before noon. But I hate it. I really have to start going to bed way earlier too. At least you have an excuse, I don't....
    But that will be so great to stay home. I love it and I am sure Riley is going to love it too!

    1. My new excuse will be "But Vanessa does it!!" :) I just LOVE late night sewing. I probably wont get ready until later still, because I can't get a shower until Riley's napping. He will rip the house apart if I don't watch him like a hawk.

  2. Kourtney,

    I am so glad you got that sweet call from your husband...and all I have to say is WELCOME to the world of stay at home mommy!!! You are going to love it! Look at you already off to a running start with these fantastic goals. I can tell its in your blood and you are going to be a pro in no time!

    I happened to notice that you have an advertisement from Panga Swim wear on your side bar, and I just wanted to let you know but you probably already do because I bet you get sale emails, that they have some five dollar per item sale items on the small sizes. Do you already have a Panga suit? Do you like it? I bought the white Annie top and skirt. I am not so hot on white but I did like that style best but its also what was on sale for so cheap besides the Beth top, which I don't like as much. Anyway, how's your Sunday School class going? Rock on that you are teaching Sunday School it really has us emerge in the doctrine huh.

    1. Thank you! Yes I do have a Panga suit, I have the same one as you! (I could not resist the price..) and I love it! I was nervous about the white but since there are extra layers over the 'essential' areas I haven't been afraid to get wet, and I was surprised that it didn't match my skin. ;)
      The lessons have been going well, I think the hardest part is wondering if what I wanted to say came across as coherently as I'd hoped! Sometimes what makes sense in my head just doesn't translate.